Courage
by loonygirl22
Summary: At first, she was surprised when she received Ginny’s message. She asked her how much he’d drunk, and she replied, “He stopped counting at twenty-four shots. I stopped counting after fifty-six.” Chapter 3: Epilogue
1. Courage

**A/N:** Here's another one to bite the dust. Just kidding.

* * *

"_Hermione, you have to come down here. It's Harry."_

She dusted off the soot from the fireplace and looked around _The_ _Drinking Irishman. _The pub was full today, as it was everyday. She tried to be inconspicuous, which was easy enough with the smoke, light, and general atmosphere of the place, as she charged her way further. She gave Dean a slight nod when she saw him by the counter. He smiled at her, and pointed at the private booth at the far end where Ginny told her where he was. At first, she was surprised when she received Ginny's message. She asked her how much he'd drunk, and she replied, _"He stopped counting at twenty-four shots. I stopped counting after fifty-six."_ She sighed and thought to herself, _why would Harry drink this much? _By then, worry overwhelmed her, and before she knew it, she had already flooed over.

She saw him slouched over the table in that dark corner. She guessed the glasses were already cleared but he was holding onto a half empty Ogden's.

He stilled for a moment before taking a big gulp as if in celebration. "Ginny! You came!" he slurred, as he raised his bottle high.

She felt a slight pang in her heart when he called her Ginny. He never did that before, not once, not even by mistake. She shrugged the feeling off when she realized he didn't have his glasses on. Relief passed through her. She looked around for them and saw it with the lenses broken on the table next to him. She was about to point it out when he started talking again.

"I mean, you came back," he laughed, and took a sip. "Your hair reminds me of your brother."

_So that's why_, she thought. She wore her favorite red bonnet that hid most of her shoulder length hair. _How ironic._ She was about to take it off and tell him that she was Hermione but he beat her again.

"I would never tell Hermione this but," he leaned in conspiringly, although his direction was off a bit. "I hate Ron."

At that, she was stunned. Harry hated Ron? When did that happen? Why? There were so many questions floating in her head, so many she wanted to blurt out right that second. But she knew that if Harry found out that she was not Ginny, he wouldn't tell her anything. She waited patiently for him to continue.

"Surprised, huh?" he said, his tone was subdued. He stared at the bottle. "I'm sorry. He's your brother… Oh, where are my manners? Sit, sit!" He pointed at the many chairs around the table.

She stared at him for a moment before taking the farthest seat from him.

"I'm sorry. He's my first friend," he paused. "No, Hagrid's my first friend!" he found something funny in that statement. "Ron, Ron is my first best friend! I can always count on him, Ron. He's loyal. A true friend," he said quietly. She would've smiled at what he was saying, but she couldn't understand for the life of her why he would say that he hated his _best _friend.

"He would be always there for me, I know that. Ron, my best friend," he smiled at something. But his smile slowly turned into a flat line. "My best friend, Ron… I hate him because in three days," he started mentally counting, which was quite hard to do in his state, "No, two. Three!" he concluded with a triumphant smile. He lifted the bottle to his lips, and before taking a big swig, he whispered, "He'll marry my other best friend."

She stiffened at his words. _No, _she kept repeating.

"Hermione… my other best friend." His face was solemn when he said those words. He looked at the bottle again and twirled its contents. It looked as though the liquid mesmerized him into a trance. "Hermione. She never, ever," he emphasized the last word, "left my side. She's the most compassionate, caring, and down right stubborn girl you'll ever meet. You know, Ron left me twice before. Twice!" he held up two of his fingers in an effort. "But Hermione... she never did that."

Her heart was pounding so fast that she feared that it might stop any second. _No._

He took a sip once more. "Did you know that Ron left us in a tent while hunting those blasted things?" he said, staring at an engraving on the table. He followed the lines with his finger. "He actually asked her to choose between me and him. And at that time I thought, 'she'll pick him. I'll be all alone. She'll pick him.' But she didn't. She stayed with me. I could see that Ron was furious. But at that moment, I didn't care. She picked me. That was all that matters."

Her breathing came in short puffs as she remembered those times, a few years ago. _Please, no._

"She cried. A lot," he laid his head down on his other arm while he still played with the lines on the table. "I wanted to comfort her so much but I couldn't bring myself to it. It hurt because she was crying over _him_. I was scared. Some Gryffindor, huh?" he chuckled hollowly. "I used to dream about her. Who am I kidding? I still dream about her. Every single fucking moment. It took all of my will power to not _do_ something while in that tent, or every single time I see or think about her."

_Merlin, no…_

He lifted his head up and rested it on his hand. His other hand was still tightly curled around the bottle. "I blame myself for this. I should've done something. I should've told Ron what I really felt when the opportunity came. It did, but I was too scared to admit it."

She couldn't take it anymore. She stood up, and stalked away from him, her patience gone. A few moments later, she came back with Dean in tow.

"Hey, Harry!" he said jovially. "It's getting late, I'll take you home."

"Dean?" he squinted his eyes, as Dean lifted him up, transferring Harry's weight onto his.

"Yeah mate. _Ginny_ here told me you needed help." Dean gave her a pointed look.

"Thank you, Ginny." Harry slurred.

When they entered Harry's flat, Dean promptly led him to the couch. "You alright, mate?" he asked him. Harry nodded vigorously, which caused him to groan. Dean studied Harry for a moment and turned to look at Hermione. "Are you sure you could handle this?"

She gave him a nod and hugged him. "Call me if you need anything," he said to her. "G'night, mate," he said to Harry as he walked to the fireplace. Harry gave him a weak wave, and in a second, Dean was gone.

She stared at Harry for a long minute, and contemplated on what to do with him. He slumped on the couch, his head resting on its arm. He started talking again.

"Ron asked me if I loved her," she knew which _her_ he was referring to. "I wanted to scream, to shout at him. But I couldn't do it. You know what I did? I told him I loved her. _Like a sister. _How stupid was that?"

She knees gave in which produced a thud when she sat heavily on the coffee table opposite him. _Oh, Merlin._

"She was never a sister to me. I've been thinking of very non-sisterly things when it comes to her," he laughed, his eyes were half laden. "I think it started even before that blasted locket. Every night after that, I imagined what it would be like to kiss her like that. It almost killed me."

Tears were forming from her closed eyes. She couldn't take this.

"But I did. I kissed her, once." Her eyes opened and she could see a fond smile on his face. "The night before she woke up when she was attacked," It still pained her to think bout that. She was on a mission that night when they were suddenly ambushed by rogue death eaters. She knew she put up a good fight, but one of them caught her off guard. She was lucky she didn't get the AK after that.

"I sat by her bed every single night. I never left her side that week." His voice was quiet, like he was reliving the moment. "I couldn't even begin to describe how I felt when I found out what happened to her. It was like a part of me died, knowing I could've prevented it from happening." He sighed. "I remember staring at her face. She was beautiful, in every sense of the word, and I've been dreaming about kissing her every moment at that point and I just couldn't resist anymore. I remembered the only fairy tale I read, about Sleeping Beauty, and thought I should give it a try. That was my excuse for kissing her, if someone caught me," he smiled fondly. "So I slowly touched my lips with hers. It was better than I've ever imagined, although in my dreams she was kissing me back. She didn't wake up. But I didn't mind that. I decided I was going to tell her everything, how I felt and all the moment she wakes up." His smile slowly vanished. "She did the next day, but I was hours too late. When I came to see her, she was already engaged with Ron."

_Please…_

"I was too scared to admit it. I should've said something, anything to her," he fully closed his eyes, but not before saying, "I love her."

She sat there silently for minutes, hours, days even. She looked at him; the pain in her heart was unbearable. Slowly, she inched her way towards him until her face was close enough to his ear. "You can't do this to me. It's unfair." She whispered fervently. "You can't. I waited for you, Harry. I waited! But not once, ever! You didn't show anything towards me. I'm sorry, Harry. It's too late." Her tears were already flowing silently. "I love you. So much. With all my heart. With all of me. But I love Ron, too. It's too late, Harry. I'm sorry, so sorry."

She kissed him on his cheek, pouring her love through that single kiss. She knew it was her good bye to him, and she never wanted it to end. She stood up with a sigh, and got his glasses which she pocketed before they left the pub. A silent _oculus reparo _was muttered, and she left the newly repaired glasses on the table. She went to the fireplace with a heavy heart, picked up a handful of powder and disappeared out of sight.

Her 'I love you' before she left still hung in the air.

His eyes opened, tears freely flowing from his tired eyes. "I'm sorry too, Hermione. I'm a coward. With all my heart, with all of me, I love you."

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**A/N:** Hate it? Love it? Personally, I think this is the best one I've written so far. I don't know, for me, this and _Remember _are my personal favorites, as well as the next not-yet-uploaded chapters of _A Very Sirius Plan_. So, you tell me. Please and thank you!


	2. Author's Note

**Author's Note:**

Alright, I've been reading back on my works, and since I had nothing better to do, I decided to continue with this, as promised. I intended for this next chapter to be a stand-alone, but as I was writing it, I couldn't help but add a few references on _Courage _so it ended up being an epilogue of that. I do hope you enjoy this, as much as you enjoyed reading _Courage. _Please do not oblige yourselves into reading the next chapter. I really just wanted an explanation for the epilogue in DH, and _Courage _was what came out of it. The following chapter would be a complete satiation of my delusion for Harry and Hermione.

Thank you so much. Alas, along with you then.

Loony


	3. Epilogue

"Tell Auror Potter to come in here right this instant." Her voice made her assistant quiver as he scurried off to do what she ordered.

When the heavy door closed behind him, she sighed and sat down heavily on her chair. _What the hell, Harry? _Her mind was going in all directions as she processed what to do first. She sent her best team along with trainee Aurors—_trainees!_—for a surveillance job a few days ago. It was supposedly a harmless mission, a simple course requirement for these students. However, this was a high profile stake-out that was why she sent her senior trainers and back-up, just in case. _A good call_, she scoffed. She rummaged through all of the paperwork from this disaster and scowled at every single one of them.

A knock stilled her movements. She closed her eyes and counted from ten backwards. When she reached one, she sighed again and called out, "Come in."

Harry went in and walked to the front of her desk. _Limping idiot. _"What did you do to Johnny? He was about to pee in his trousers when—," he stopped in what he was saying when he saw the look on her face.

She leaned back on her chair and matched his gaze with her own. They stared at each other for a moment and then he coughed and started with, "Before you say anything—"

"Auror Potter," she said with her most controlled voice. Any minute now she was going to blow a fuse if she let him speak, she knew. She sure as hell didn't want to lose her composure.

"_Ma'am_," was his response with a slight nod. This irked her more. _5, 4, 3…_

"Take a seat. I'm sure your busted leg couldn't take the pressure of your humongous head," she spat out.

"I'm sure my leg could take it, Ma'am," he replied.

"Oh, really?" she brought out a piece of paper and did not keep her eyes off it. "What about your three broken ribs, fractured hip and collar bone, sprained wrist, and lacerations and bruises all over your body? What about that collapsed lung? Can they take the pressure?" she asked but not without the venom in her words as she tossed the paper into the pile on her desk. She rarely does this act since she was such a neat freak. She saw the alarm bells flicker on his face.

His gaze lowered and after a few tense moments, he spoke calmly, "I'm all fixed, Ma'am. The limp will be gone after I take a good night's rest."

"I don't care," she said as she stood up. She knew he was putting up a strong front for her sake. _Bloody idiot. _"Take a seat, Auror Potter," she ordered as she crossed her table and stood in front of him. She met him at eye level once again and she knew through his eyes that he was going into a losing battle. Begrudgingly, he sat down on one of the chairs in front of her table. She saw him wince as he did so, and that gave her a little bit of satisfaction. _Serves you right, you dolt. _

"Now tell me, what in Merlin's name do you think you accomplished after that?" she demanded.

"We caught Ermes Moretti, Ma'am," he said. Her blood boiled in her veins. She didn't know whether it was because of Harry's arrogant demeanor or that bastard's name. Moretti is a wizard but chose to live outside of the Wizarding community. He chose to be a high-ranking official with very powerful muggle connections. He smuggled drugs and weapons all over and killed hundreds of rural villagers or made slaves of them for his "expansion projects". He had recently adapted a liking for dark magic through the black market and was seen dealing with a few sketchy wizards. They had information that there would be a meeting of some sort in a village in Italy. This was where Harry and his team had the stake out.

"Yes, but you endangered twenty of your men, injured ten of your subordinates and all 5 of your trainees, and almost killed yourself, along with Peterson and Wyatt. You took down twenty-three of his men. But subsequently, four muggles were killed," she crossed her arms as she told him the casualties of the encounter. "What was the protocol? I'm sure you know this by heart but being you, you neglected it, time and time again."

"Hermione—," he started.

"What was the protocol?" she repeated, ignoring him.

He sighed and looked away. "If we were compromised, abort the mission, apparate the trainees back to HQ, stun all witnesses, and get out immediately."

"And did you do that, _Senior Auror_ Potter? _Were_ you even compromised?" she forced him to look at her. She was breathing heavily by this time, her pent up anger rising to the occasion.

"With all due respect, _Ma'am_," he seethed, "I had to do what I had to do. There was no time. We had enough evidence that he was about to start havoc in the Wizarding and muggle world that very same night. You would've done the same if you were there."

She shook her head. "I would just go into battle without any plan at all?"

"We had a plan. Before we went out there, we made up another plan, and a whole lot of others. That was _protocol_," he shot back. She closed her eyes again, and took a ragged breath.

"Do you know how many obliviators are out there in the field now? You risked our exposure! It was a _muggle_ village! Over a hundred people saw what happened," she jabbed a finger on his chest.

He was quiet for a minute and then quietly said, "At least we saved their lives and millions of others."

"By risking the lives of the people around you and your team? Risking your life?" she asked as her eyes bore on his. He didn't back out of her challenge.

"That's nothing new, right?" he asked rhetorically with a ghost of a smirk on his face. But then, his face fell. "I was the head in that assignment and I take full responsibility for what happened."

"Do you want to die, Harry? Do you?" she shouted at him. She tried to keep her calm, she really did. But she failed miserably. She leaned on her table for support as she calmed herself down. After a tense minute, she softly added, "Well, _I_ don't want you to."

He tried to get up and comfort her, but she quickly moved out of the way to sit in her chair once again. She collected the scattered papers on her desk and piled them to the side. She looked back at him and saw that he was now standing again, waiting for her to speak up. She rubbed her temples and without opening her eyes, she said, "Your mission was for surveillance purposes only, but you acted on impulse and took care of the job on your own. You acted out of line and disregarded the protocol. You risked exposure and the lives of your team, the people around you and your life. Do you have anything to say for yourself, Auror Potter?"

"I would do it again just to catch that fucker," he said with confidence.

She looked at him and was quiet as she contemplated on her decision. "There will be a trial on Friday concerning today's mission. A lot of people are angered by what you did." She heard him say "What else is new," but she continued, ignoring him. "But I will support you, as your division head. The next time you do this, I would personally suspend you until further notice. Have you filled out all your necessary paperwork?"

All she received was a curt nod. "Alright, I don't want to see you around here until Friday morning. You are dismissed, Auror Potter."

He didn't move on his spot and she knew he wanted to say something. She looked at him and asked, "Anything more?"

"Why are you so mad?" he said faintly but still matching her intense gaze.

"Because once again, you were reckless and didn't consider about your own safety," she said honestly. She didn't know how to control her emotions when it came to her professional and personal life, most especially when it came to _his _well-being.

He didn't answer right away, but she knew _I'm sorry _would come out of his mouth. "What do you want me to do, Hermione? The opportunity was there. You know that if it was in my grasp, I would take it."

"Really?" she asked softly. Her sarcasm stunned him for a long second. She knew that they both knew that this wasn't about the mission anymore.

_This isn't the time and place for this, _her mind insisted. But she couldn't stop the onslaught of her thoughts. _You had a lot of chances, Harry! But you didn't tell me… you didn't. Not once._

She jerked herself out of her thoughts and chastised herself for her weakness. She took a few moments, composing herself. She was not going to let her emotions get to her. She would never do that again.

"I do now. I'm not a coward anymore," he whispered. And once again, she knew that they both felt the implications of what he said. She looked up at him, and held his gaze. He gave her a small nod, "Ma'am," and he turned away. Before he could get to the door, she spoke up.

"I just don't want you to get hurt, Harry. Please don't die," then she added quietly, "just like Ron."

He turned around at that and was about to say something but she interrupted him. "I may not have been Mrs. Weasley, but I did love and care for him, just like I do with you," _Lie, _her mind argued. "You both are my family, and with him gone," she choked with her last words, her tears finally resurfacing. "I just want you safe, Harry. Please promise me that."

She could see his struggle but then he made up his decision. In quick strides, as much as his leg would let him, he was in front of her. He turned her chair around and kneeled with his good leg, and hugged her close. She did not know how to react at first, but then she let her instincts take over. She let her tears run freely as she held on for dear life. After all of these years, he still had that effect on her. She cried harder on his shoulder. Her thoughts drifted to Ron. She really did love him. She gave him her heart. But she couldn't fight it anymore. It just wasn't enough, and it wasn't fair to him when she had already given it to someone else a long time ago.

They never talked about what happened. He blamed himself for what happened with Ron. She also blamed herself. All of them were in that same mission, one of the most dangerous in their careers. They won eventually, but it cost them the life of their best friend. They both immersed themselves in their work, and achieved what they had only dreamed of, with Harry being a Senior Auror, a hands-on job with the students and the field, and with Hermione being a division head in the MLE. But they both had three years of mindless hellos and good byes, birthday gifts and Christmas greetings. This was the first time in years that he was this close.

She pulled back a moment later and closed her eyes as he wiped her tears with his thumbs. "I promise," he said.

Something changed, she knew he could sense that. She could feel it too, in her heart, in her soul. Something changed, and for now, that was enough.

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**A/N:** Now, I don't know how I came up with that. Hopefully, it was good. Thank you for reading.


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